Researchers have found that there are three different types of vow renewal events:
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Couple or family-initiated, where the couple or family members plan a renewal of vows ceremony.
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Relational repair event, where the estranged couple or severely emotionally challenged couple, after separation, came together to renew their vows.
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Group renewal of vows event, usually planned by a church where many couples could renew their vows, simultaneously. Reasons for holding the vow renewal event can differ within these three types.
Commemorating a milestone in a couples’ marriage, is probably the biggest reason for the majority of married couples and fits into the first type of vow-renewal. Several different goals or motivations are reflected as couples pay homage to their marriage by giving themselves “the real wedding” that they never had. Perhaps, they had limited financial means when they were first married, or married during wartime. Now they choose to have a large, formal wedding ceremony with all the tradition trimmings (e.g., wedding gown, formal attire, beautiful flower arrangements and a great big wedding cake).
The second type of vow renewal ritual is one that reflects repair. Very often, the couple chooses to renew their vows to mark a true turning point in their relationship where they have managed to overcome a serious obstacle which had the strong potential to disengage them as a couple. Such a crisis might be the challenge of an extramarital affair, meeting that challenge and working it out, together, then moving on to a successful stage of the couples relational history.. Saving the marriage and renewing their wedding vows! In many instances where great healing is needed, it requires great courage from both the husband, and the wife, to rise to the occasion in giving each other “that second chance” to make it work. I think God must smile when this happens..
Thirdly, there have been known to be mass ceremonies where many couples decide to renew their vows in a special group setting. Most often, these events occur in a church setting, but have been known to occur in unique settings, chosen by the majority. A big celebration follows.
In summary, the marriage vow renewal event is a communication ritual that pays tribute to both the unique marital bond between marriage partners, as well as to the broader institution of marriage. This is a very important institution, if not the most important institution which affects families, friends, and community.
Jana Norrell/901-335-0200
